I have had a really crummy day today. And I mean REALLY crummy. Like, so crummy that I have to break my rules on using the word "like" at the beginning of a sentence AND using all caps for emphasis.
This year has not exactly been the bright shining star that I might have hoped for at the beginning of the year. If I had known what I know now I would have made resolutions along the lines of, "Don't leave the house. Ever." Or possibly, "Hide from authority figures." Needless to say, I do not have the gift of premonition, nor do I have the technology for time travel, so I am pretty much stuck with the year that I have had.
Some good things have come out of my trials this year. First, I love Mr. Bear Slippers more than I ever have (if that is at all possible). He and I have really been through the wringer this year. Interesting fact: Did you know that a "wringer" refers to an old fashioned clothes dryer in which you cranked your clothes between two rollers? It would wring out the water. So when you imagine us going through the wringer, picture this:
Yes, our wringer came with the dutiful housewife in an apron too.
Anyway, I found out today that I likely have a medical condition that is going to follow me throughout my life, and it was sort of the icing on my proverbial cake. It seemed fitting in a way that a year that has been so rough should end on this note. I am wondering what exactly it is that Heavenly Father would like for me to take out of this year. Clearly whatever the lesson is, I am not learning it. But at the same time, I got a wonderful little reminder of how precious his tender mercies can be. On the way home from picking up Baby Bear Slippers from her grandmother, I asked Mr. Bear Slippers if he might not pick up my prescriptions later as he was going out anyway and they weren't supposed to be done for another half hour. Just as I finished asking him, my phone rang and it was the pharmacy calling to let me know that my prescriptions were ready. As I hung up the phone, Baby Bear Slippers piped up from the backseat, "Heavenly Father did that for you mom!" Mr. Bear Slippers and I got a much needed laugh that God saw fit to help me out in my time of need, and we engaged in a nice round of morbid humor. I must say, morbid humor is my favorite kind and I always make jokes to lighten the mood, even if it is my own problem that I am laughing at. As we pulled into the pharmacy parking lot, the spot right in front of the doors was available and I pointed out to Mr. Bear Slippers that "Heavenly Father did that for him."
I think that sometimes the help that is offered may not be the help that we would like to have. In this case, I would much rather that I never had to deal with this problem. But at the same time, everyone has stuff that they have to deal with and I am grateful that I am not so jaded that I can't see when the Lord is giving me the little lift that I need, when I need it. In this case, I was so blessed to have my daughter in the backseat offering the perspective that only a child could have the clarity of mind and spirit to see under the circumstances.(She doesn't even know that I am having a problem.) But when I needed that little reminder that my Father in Heaven loves me, my baby girl was there to deliver. He can't make my problems go away, or at the very least he shouldn't, but he does have the power to ease my suffering.
Having this perspective was a lovely thing in a time of need, and when I got home and pulled out my bright and shiny new orange pill bottle to read the directions (Take With Food), I remembered that Oreos count as food. Also, when I dropped the first pill into my hand, it was my favorite shade of blue. Clearly a case of kismet. Perhaps the greatest gift the Lord gave me was not the prescription being ready a half hour early, or even the parking spot in the front of the pharmacy. Tonight, the gifts that I am most grateful for are Mr. and Baby Bear Slippers.
Baby Bear Slippers on her 8th birthday.
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